The Legend of Peter Crouch

Peter Crouch was a fantastic servant for Liverpool and the 6 foot 7 striker is as loved today for his witty sense of humour as he is for the time he played for the Reds.

His greatness is rarely ever talked about.

A career that spanned over 20 years and 13 different clubs. Over 100 Premier League goals and the record for most headed goals in Premier League history.

I would imagine he’s the only person to ever win Stoke City’s Player of the Year, Portsmouth’s Player of the Season, and QPR’s Player of the Season (I would be surprised if he wasn’t).

He helped Norwich gain promotion and won the FA Cup with Liverpool. How many players can say they played in the Swedish second division and for England in the World Cup?

At just over two metres, Peter Crouch’s towering presence won’t be forgotten any time soon. Capable of a wonder goal on his day and a robot when appropriate. Let’s explore some of Peter Crouch’s greatest moments.

Perfect Hat-trick Against Arsenal

The first hat-trick of his club career came in Liverpool’s 4-1 thrashing of Arsenal.

The first goal was scored by his right foot, connecting on a low cross from Alvaro Arbeloa beating Jens Lehmann at his near-post.

The second a delightful header off of a lovely lofted ball by the Brazilian, Fábio Aurélio. Crouch outjumped Abou Diaby and gave Lehmann no chance, again.

The third was the pick of the bunch, off a first-time ball by Jermaine Pennant. Crouch displayed incredible close control and left Kolo Toure for dead, before slotting it home with his left.

A perfect hat-trick, a perfect performance. One could argue without his goals, the game would have ended a tie. 

The First Robot

Peter Crouch became synonymous with robotic dancing throughout his career. A celebration loved by all for his immense dancing talent and his flair.

The first robot came after a goal for England against Hungary. Two more came in a hat-trick for England against Jamaica and thus, a legend was born.

At this point the line is so blurred, it’s hard to know if Peter Crouch or the robot came first.

Marrying Abbey Clancy

I think Abbey Clancy is beautiful. I think Peter Crouch is beautiful in a different way that’s less about looks, but more about the person rooted deep inside of him. He has a beautiful soul. I’m sure Abbey was able to recognize that, too. They’re lucky to have each other.

Winning Tottenham’s Striker of the Decade Twitter Poll

Harry Kane didn’t deserve it.

Maybe, he scored more goals than Crouchie. Maybe, Crouchie never netted over ten Premier League goals in a season for Tottenham.

Maybe, who cares because the joy he brought to the game, brought home the same amount of trophies that Harry Kane’s goals did for Tottenham.

Zero. 

Three Delightful Wonder Goals

Peter Crouch was no Jan Koller. He was much more technically gifted.

Those chopsticks of legs were capable of greatness. A lovely overhead kick against Galatasaray is a perfect example of that, his one against Bolton to a lesser extent as well.

The pièce de résistance though, has to be his goal against Man City for Stoke. An absolute sumptuous half volley from far out and at an angle to beat Joe Hart in his prime. His goal helped grab a vital 1-1 draw against the Cityzens, who would go on to win the league.

Without that point, Stoke might not have finished in 14th that year.

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